Lighten Up: A Christmas rodeo at the mart
With the rodeo and cowboy life in general enjoying a resurgence, I believe it's high time the marts embraced the idea of holding some class of a rodeo, before, during or after a mart sale.
Ever a man to spot an opportunity, I have fixed upon a great scheme to further enhance our cattle marts' standing in our world.
With the rodeo and cowboy life in general enjoying a resurgence, I believe it's high time the marts embraced the idea of holding some class of a rodeo, before, during or after a mart sale.
Now, before you think I've lost the plot, let me explain... First of all, it would be a surefire way of generating interest in cattle, revenue, and generally boosting the rating of a mart. I think the idea of a rodeo has all the hallmarks of a winner.
Granted, there might be a few health and safety issues to be ironed out first, to satisfy the old PC brigade. But besides crossing the T's, dotting the I's, and wearing a crash helmet, I see little to get in our way.
The mart is ideally suited for the purpose of a bull or even dry cow rodeo, given that it provides us with access to cattle (some of the wild variety) and people (some of the wild variety).
All we really have to do is bring the two together to make the magic happen.
Can you imagine the roars around the ring when you nominate yourself to climb onboard the back of a hardy animal exhibiting a bit of seasonal spirit?
It would certainly jolly a fellow up for the Christmas and put him in a great mood for the few pints.
There would be risk involved, of course there would, for nothing wonderful in life is ever achieved without a degree of risk.
Bones might be broken, noses could be put out of joint (literally), but the way I look at it, if it puts a smile on the faces of the children, wouldn't it be worth it?
Bones heal, my friend, fond memories last forever.
Beggars can't be choosers.
It's all about looking at the flowers in life, and not the weeds.
Size isn't everything, as I keep on telling my wife.
Sure, back in the day, the Titanic was massive, and where did that get anyone?
Kate Winslet could tell you all about it.
We can't all be cushioned from every circumstance in life.
The mart ring would be the perfect spot for a rodeo and the perfect spot to land after your high jinks.
A little bit of padding on the bars, a bit more sawdust on the ground, and off with you.
Pressure, my dear man, is only for tyres.
A bareback rodeo, let's say in Macroom or Kanturk mart during the festive lull, would certainly get us over the Christmas hump and put us on the right track for 2026.
It's a no-brainer, really. I have it all worked out and have never been more optimistic about success.
A mart rodeo would be the ideal way to bounce heartily into Christmas and onto 2026.
So, with that, Happy Christmas one and all. And 'Yee haw!'
