DangerHere.com: The Week in Guff

Andy Townsend not up to speed: “The players are always greeted with such velocity here at Old Trafford.”

DangerHere.com: The Week in Guff

Bryan Swanson couldn’t believe his ears: “There was total silence from Old Trafford, which means the alarm bells were ringing.”

BBC’s John Murray goes elemental: “Some coaches would have poured fire on those stormy waters.”

Owen Coyle rebrands the kick: “A reverse backheel there...”

Don’t count on Toby Gilles: “It’s just a four-word denial from the club so far: David Moyes hasn’t been sacked.”

Or Steve McClaren ahead of the play-offs: “It’s a two-off game and anything can happen.”

David Ginola fondly recalled the Villa glory days: “You’ve got women working in the kitchen every day for the entire season, giving you pleasure.”

Paul Dickov is looking in the wrong places: “I can’t remember Sam Johnstone having a save to make and he’s picked the ball out of his net three times.”

Tim Sherwood on 10-man Stoke: “Their fans were like a 12th man for them, so it was almost even.”

Mark Pougatch won’t give an inch: “You give footballers half a chance and they take a mile.”

Steve Bates saves on water charges: “Don’t throw the baby out with the dishwater.”

PUNBELIEVABLE JEFF

Stelling keeping it Real with Benzema in Champions League: “They do say the Karim always rises to the top.”

WAY WITH WORDS

Tony Cascarino on Mourinho: “He had an irony of sarcasm in his comments.”

Paul Merson on Aaron Ramsey: “He just gives them so much different.”

LITTLE ENGLAND UPDATE

Simon Brotherton pays the highest possible tribute to three-time Bundesliga winner Felix Magath: “The Tony Pulis of German football.”

TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE

Dunphy on Mourinho: “Even I can’t stand much more of him.”

THE VOICE OF BITTER EXPERIENCE

Paul Merson reckons Randy Lerner is eyeing the Villa exit door rather than the transfer window: “If I was married and I know I’m getting a divorce, I wouldn’t buy my missus a new sofa.”

SELF-AWARENESS CHAMPION

Fabian Delph: “If I was in the stand seeing Delphy give it away every two minutes I’d probably have a go. I’d be screaming, ‘Delph, what you doing?’”

TACTICS TRUCK

These days underlaps are the new overlaps. But Glenn Hoddle has taken things a step further: “Bayern last year made more overlaps and interlaps.”

TACTFUL TRUCK

Tony Gale’s restrained and thoughtful reaction to the David Moyes sacking on Sky Sports News: “Senior players should be hanging themselves.”

Steve Wilson didn’t do much to spare Sam Allardyce’s feelings after a “Fat Sam Out” banner appeared on Match of the Day: “There are very few thicker skinned managers.”

NUMBERS GAME

Diego Maradona might have filed a criminal complaint against his ex Rocío Oliva and accused her of stealing €250,000 worth of jewellery and watches, but love might yet find a way: “He gave me gifts, and I gave them back. It’s sad, but this love isn’t over. Our chances of getting back together? I give it a three out of ten.”

GIGGS WILL TEAR YOU APART

RTÉ Sport confirm Giggsy will be relying on his experience: “Ryan Giggs will assume responsibility for first-team affairs at Man United.”

INSIGHT DEPARTMENT

Glenn Hoddle after Real’s 1-0 win over Munich: “Madrid are still in this tie.”

THE FINAL INSULT

They never treated him that well. Now Gary Neville has wiped Frank O’Farrell from history: “Manchester Utd have only appointed British managers.”

TWEET @dangerhere

x

More in this section

Sport

Newsletter

Sign up to our daily sports bulletin, delivered straight to your inbox at 5pm. Subscribers also receive an exclusive email from our sports desk editors every Friday evening looking forward to the weekend's sporting action.

Cookie Policy Privacy Policy Brand Safety FAQ Help Contact Us Terms and Conditions

© Examiner Echo Group Limited