Tony Bates: Learn to fight fairly and forgive to keep the love alive

"Ursula had no such ‘happy-ever-after’ illusions. She was never going to allow me to wallow, half-asleep, in a world of make-believe. She saw marriage as a way for us both to wake up."

"The bond of trust that sustains real, lasting relationships is forged as much in the white heat of conflict as in a passionate embrace."

Little makes us more vulnerable than falling in love. We have met someone we don’t want to lose. Intimacy is also where we encounter our most personal fears and insecurities: We are defenceless. 

However, a close, loving relationship is also the most powerful opportunity we will have to heal and grow.