Nightmare scenario gives me the blues

WHAT a great week it’s been; I may be shattered and skint, but I have a massive grin on my face.

Or should I say “did” have a massive grin on my face — until I got a text from an old mate who makes my pontifications of doom look blindly optimistic.

He told me that his recurring dream of losing EVERYTHING to United had just come one step nearer by actually qualifying for the FA Cup final. In his nightmare, which has naturally also become mine — they beat us to the Premiership title on goal difference, the FA Cup on penalties, and the European Cup to a last minute solo-wonder goal by Ronaldo. I feel sick, very sick.