Kilts take spoils in Clash of the Celts

THE country’s politicians showed they had plenty of balls yesterday but fell foul to a cruel reversal of political fortunes.

After throwing away a two-goal lead, Ireland’s TDs and Senators, went down 3-2 to their Scottish counterparts in a friendly football match.

The ‘Clash of the Celts’ inter-parliamentary match was held to highlight the Irish-Scottish bid to host the Euro 2008 football championships.

Captain Fantastic Jimmy Deenihan was in no doubt that his star-studded side had blown their chance of glory in the first game of its kind in 25 years.

“We were robbed and we got complacent but it was a very good sporting game,” ‘The Gaffer’ Deenihan said.

Heading into a 2-0 lead after just 10 minutes with a brace from Man of the Match Niall Blaney, the Irish were ultimately clawed back and conceded defeat to a late controversial goal.

In a passionate encounter at Trinity College in Dublin, the Irish side came out in front at least in terms of injuries, drawing blood from Scotland’s Duncan Hamilton and laying out ex-First Minister Henry McLeish.

Not even the presence on the sideline of regular political football player Bertie Ahern as cheerleader-in-chief could inspire the Irish to victory.

“It has shown solidarity from both parliaments in the bid for 2008 across all parties.

“It is not easy to get them together to do anything but we’ve here got them all together playing a match in support of the decision that’s being taken on December 12,” ‘Attacker’ Ahern said.

The revenge mission will come in February.

That’s when it’s hoped the rematch will be held in Glasgow’s Ibrox Stadium, the home of Rangers football club. In what may yet be considered the deciding factor in winning the Euro 2008 bidding contest, ‘Dynamo’ Deenihan announced the two countries will hold a European parliamentarians soccer championships if the hosting bid is successful.

In view of Ireland’s failure to provide any stadia as yet, it’s about our best contribution to the bid so far.

Ireland: Jimmy ‘Dynamic’ Deenihan (Captain), MJ ‘Knobbly Knees’ Nolan, Simon ‘Chopper’ Coveney, John Paul ‘Psycho’ Phelan, Fergal ‘Battle Axe’ Browne, Damien ‘Eyeball’ English, John ‘Dixie’ Deasy, Frank ‘That wasn’t very far away’ Feighan, Niall ‘Bomber’ Blaney, Barry ‘Bite Yer Legs’ Andrews, Richard ‘Bonebreaker’ Bruton, Tom ‘Killer’ Kitt, Billy ‘Klogger’ Kelliher, Joe ‘Magic’ McHugh, Paul ‘Goalbound’ Gogarty, Sean ‘Piledriver’ Power and Martin ‘Cruncher’ Cullen.