Joanna Fortune: My teenager is refusing to talk to me after a big row

Initiating repair communicates that your relationship matters more to you than being right, and it’s stronger than this row

Your teenage daughter’s brain is developing in a particular way during early adolescence. The part of her brain associated with impulsivity, thrill-seeking, and reward-driven actions is developing quickly, while the part of her brain associated with reason, rational thought, and executive function — for example, weighing up the pros and cons of a situation or action — is grossly underdeveloped at this stage. Picture: iStock 

I had a huge row with my 13-year-old daughter last week about the state of her room. She never cleans it and leaves her laundry piled up on the floor. I lost my temper when the dog decided to urinate on her dirty clothes. She hasn’t spoken to me since. She won’t even eat the dinners I cook and is snacking instead. What can I do to break this impasse?

You mention that you lost your temper but you probably were simmering in frustration for a while leading up to this row.