Ask Audrey: Is it still wild camping if we bring the Nespresso machine?

Sorting out Cork people for ages...

We’re having a nightmare of a summer, here in Kinsale. Normally,  the streets would be full of cultured foreigners, with their lovely,  olive skin, supporting our local economy by spending a fortune on over-priced sweaters. (We’re so used to high-net-worth individuals that our shops have one-for-the-price-of-two offers, where you pay twice the sticker price  just because you can.) 

Anyway, this year w e’re infested with pasty people from Dublin in football jerseys and white socks, and that’s just the women. (All their little boys are called Nathan. WTF? ) Our beautiful beaches — the Dock, Garretstown, and Gar r ylucas — sound like a casting call for Fair City. Do you know how we might keep Dublin people away (i ncluding the posh ones: That accent of theirs would wreck your head)? Fionnuala, Kinsale.