Terrace Talk: Man United - Yet another supersub role for Solskjaer

The last line of our old Ole song from the 90s is “please don’t take/my Solskjaer / away”.

But despite Saturday’s crushing win, and any future repeats thereof, that’s precisely the supposed Woodward plan: to take him away from us come June. He’s the ‘supersub’ once more, except this time ‘sub’ stands for ‘substituted’ - he’s asked to do the match saving heroics before then making way.

Unless...

You can already see how tricky this might start getting come spring. What if he’s tootling along well enough, and in sufficiently entertaining fashion, to have the fans demanding he stays, whilst Woodward is elsewhere trying to finalise whatever his next huge cock-up of an appointment will be?

After all, that’s three in a row he’s got wrong now; why would anyone have continued faith in his choice, or luck?

Hey, maybe this time it should be put to a referendum. They always settle matters so peacefully and definitively, don’t they?

Sorry, that just slipped out; we really should try to keep the sports pages sanctuary safe from allusions to Brexit.

But it’s hard not to see a parallel with the Mourinho decision and its aftermath. It’s all very well simply saying ‘Josexit means Josexit’, but then what?

We are now in for months of speculation and argument about which direction to take, and with whom. Ole, Pochettino, Zidane, Allegri, Blanc, Carlos Kickaball, Uncle Tom Cobbley... all would represent very different approaches, and wildly varying levels of risk, with the added complication of every ex-Red in the world also applying for the new director of football post.

So if Blanc would be the safe, steady and boring equivalent of staying in the EU customs union, then mercurial mysterious Zidane might be more akin to taking a punt on ‘no deal’/WTO rules — hugely exciting but perhaps a greater risk to the frictionless imports of trophies.

The favourite is expected to remain Pochettino for the duration of the race — right up until the day he signs for Madrid, knowing Woodward’s luck.

The Old Trafford hierarchy has barely bothered to disguise its desire for months, and his ability to produce stylish, profitable, top-four football on a typically tight Tottenham budget obviously strokes all the Glazer erogenous zones.

Night, Reds ❤️ #MUFC pic.twitter.com/dXl0HGR3FD

— Manchester United (@ManUtd) December 22, 2018

Besides, actual trophies aren’t required by this regime, as we’ve discussed here before, so that’s another box potless Poch ticks.

Naturally, like most sentimental Reds, my ideal would be for Sunshine Solskjaer to be so surprisingly stunningly successful that it gradually becomes inconceivable to take him away from us.

I don’t really believe that’s a scenario that’s likely to play out, given his managerial track record offers no hint of latent Fergusonian talents — but I guess they once said that of Sir Alex himself.

He also got the sack when he first started out, after all, and wasn’t really regarded as an obvious future star boss.

Of course, we were all giddy for Ole after Saturday, which was the first match in this strange season where we were all 99% certain of the result beforehand. The players did exactly what we knew they would; bust a gut to show the world what they thought of Mourinho and the decision to sack him, and to ingratiate themselves with the new boss.

If anything, Pogba slightly disappointed. I expected a new haircut — pink for pleasure, perhaps — and a hat-trick, plus a special full-time dancing routine in the centre circle, performed around a papier-mâché model of Mourinho’s decapitated head.

Yes, you do detect a trace of bitterness there, dear reader. The pouting protesting Pogba had all but donned a gilet jaune these past few weeks, and many Reds would like to have seen him teargassed by now. Instead, he emerges from 2018’s crisis as the big winner — well, with one other contender, perhaps.

For a final thought, as we prepare to welcome Huddersfield to what should be the first great Old Trafford atmosphere of the season; what a turn-up this all is for Fergie.

In a handful of months, he’s gone from death’s door to seeing a man he never really wanted in his office sacked, and two of his most loyal troops placed in command. Fergiepower is back, and so is his health. It’s his birthday next week — he won’t get better presents than that...