TERRACE TALK: Man United - Fate in our own hands; how did that happen?

An amusing story surfaced in The Sun last week, revealing that Louis Van Gaal had ordered huge ‘anti-spy’ screens to be erected at Carrington training ground.

‘Typically perverse,’ I mused, ‘shutting out just about the only people in the world who actually want to watch this United side at the moment.’

The tale emerged after a fortnight that had seen swathes of empty seats at Old Trafford. Season ticket renewals have been dribbling along at record low levels, and my OT snout amid the beancounters reports new sales to be virtually negligible.