Minister, minister, what is your policy on Leo?

THE question shot through the air at the entrance to Fota Island resort, as the great and the good of Fine Gael faced into the abyss.

Scotland is about to decide on independence, the budget lurks in next month, the Middle East is aflame, but, really, Leo was the only show in town.

Fine Gael gathered yesterday for their back-to-school pep talk in the golf and leisure resort which sits next to the wildlife park on Fota Island. The real zoo, however, was on view at the front door to the resort as a marauding media pack hustled for some scraps from the arriving party bigwigs. Minister, minister, what’s your policy on Leo?

Mr Varadkar had done it again, spoken his mind and kicked up a storm. Last time around, his comment led to the resignation of a Garda commissioner. This time, he opined that his health portfolio should be insulated from further cuts, and, sure, maybe there would be an extra fiver a week or so for the average worker in the budget. His boss was not best pleased. A controversy has taken legs. Leo is in the doghouse with Enda once more.

Here comes James Reilly, the poor dear who was turfed from his job to make way for Leo. The minister formerly in charge of health smiled widely and said he was saying nothing on the matter, on or off the record.

Charlie Flanagan stepped out of a big car and into the fine East Cork sunshine, before advancing cautiously towards the pack. Charlie is growing into his role as Minister for Foreign Affairs, acquiring the requisite gravitas as he goes. Charlie, Leo? For an instant, Charlie looked flummoxed, as if a man of his status should no longer be bothered by little domestic tiffs, when world crises had to be tackled on a daily basis. Say no more, he said, or words to that effect.

Simon Coveney was more voluble. He said nothing about Leo in three minutes of answering the questions about Leo.

“The style of this government is to let ministers have their say,” Coveney said to the disbelief of the attendant hacks. Say it ain’t so, Simon.

The man himself was unfazed by it all. “I’ve no problem being slapped down or scolded,” Varadkar said. “I’m a big boy.”

The Taoiseach, meanwhile, kept any residual annoyance over Leo-gate mark II hidden from view, and instead turned his guns on the opposition.

Earlier, in an interview with Pat Kenny, and again at his media event in Fota, he decried Fianna Fáil as reverting to being a “tax and spend” party, suggesting they were politically bedding down with the Shinners.

Quite obviously, this is a line he intends to use from here on in, but he’s way off the mark. Fianna Fáil was a “less tax and more spending” party when in its pomp, but Kenny needs a catchy line on which to fight the forthcoming election.

“Which party do you trust to run the economy?” he asked the media. Everybody was stumped for a moment. Was this a trick question?

Flanking Mr Kenny in front of the cameras, Michael Noonan massaged the assembly with his calm reflections on the world of economics and sure, when you stand back and think about it, everything can be brought down to pounds, shillings and pence, or whatever currency you’re having yourself.

Once the media event finished, the parliamentarians went into conclave to tackle the big beasts of economy and health for the afternoon. A new format applies at this gathering, with less emphasis on bringing in experts, and more on breaking up into workshops and engaging in a little creative thinking.

Buddha Noonan kicked off proceedings before taking his leave for Milan where he continues his efforts to encourage fellow Europeans to give Paddy a break.

Everybody else broke into little groups to think all the way to sore heads, before arising to reflect on what new joys and despair the coming Dáil term will bring.