Dial M for mirth: phone home, Enda, and call it a day

WHO ya gonna call? Enda-Buster! Riverdance famously makes our Taoiseach cry, so it was fittingly patriotic of him to give us all a good St Paddy’s weekend laugh with his bizarre transatlantic trilling of Carly Rae Jepsen’s song ‘Here’s My Number, Call Me Maybe.’

For those who missed the cringing moment, Mr Kenny told a Washington DC audience: “If you’ve got a problem, or you have an issue, or an anxiety, or a concern or a proposition, or a proposal, I want to hear it. My number is a public number, you can call me anytime. Citizens in other countries find it difficult to figure out how anybody can ring the PM, or the Taoiseach in my case, and say ‘I want to talk to you’. Sometimes I don’t get a chance to answer all the calls....”

So, pitching himself as a sort of national call-centre manager, we can imagine the response if we took him up on the offer, but sadly missed the jackpot moment when Mr Kenny answers his own phone: “Press ‘one’ if you are a rich Irish-American, or well-connected Fine Gael lobbyist, for instant access to the Taoiseach.