Two Brians face Judgment Day despite blind faith in economy

THE Two Brians sat silently in the Dáil, heads down as if in prayer waiting for the fabled apparition: The Blessed Recovery.

Like the hysterical masses who besieged Knock at the weekend, certain that if they stared hard enough at the sun they would catch a glimpse of Our Lady, the dour Dáil duo had nothing to base their hopes on apart from blind faith, desperation and self-delusion.

The Two Brians have been seeing visions for some time, the Taoiseach himself appeared caught-up in rapture just before the local elections when, speaking in tongues, he told anyone who would listen that he had sighted the “green shoots” of The Blessed Recovery.