Pleading to be heard
MALLOW parents Ber and James Foley want the best for their children. Education is a priority.
They diligently searched primary schools tailored to each of their three daughters’ needs. They found the right teachers and one after another, their children Natasha, Aideen and Rebecca flourished.
But, four years ago, the parents changed their minds.
They took their eldest daughter Natasha home rather than let her study for the Leaving Certificate.
Now, seven years before Rebecca is due to sit her Junior Certificate, Ber is panicking she will have to do the same for her youngest child.
Both 20-year-old Natasha and eight-year-old Rebecca are profoundly deaf — diagnosed in the same way as two Irish children born every week.
Those living in provincial Ireland are among a neglected minority who, despite scientific advances, have to chose between five years of loneliness or losing out on secondary education.
The only suitable secondary school for girls is St Mary’s in Dublin while the neighbouring St Joseph’s caters for deaf boys.
Parents say both schools provide a top-class education, but it means students spend the best part of their teenage years away from home.
Growing up with just slips of communication with her family was too much for Natasha and, instead of proceeding to the Leaving Certificate cycle, she returned home.
“The school was fine, she got on really well and she really liked it. But it was the boarding that got to her,” Ber said, “She had never been away from me before and she found it an awful strain.
“When she got home at weekends she was just making up for lost time, trying to find out everything she was missing out on. It was the simple things, like what presents were being got for Christmas.”
Most children go to boarding school knowing their parents are a phone call away and they can spend hours chatting away homesickness.
When Natasha was 13 years old, her deafness made phones redundant.
Her mother rang the boarding house every night to see how she was but, even if Natasha stood next to the phone, the distance could not be bridged.
Ber bought a mobile phone and, after dictating message through others for a while, she forced herself to learn how to send texts herself.
It was progress, but Natasha said the long winter evenings in Cabra were hard.
“We would do our homework after class. Then at six o’clock it used to be our supper. At seven o’clock you would be allowed watch TV and, depending on what age you were, you could watch it until 9.30,” she explained through sign language.
She did not have a problem with the school, but her mother said the distance was difficult for the entire family.
“It was terrible to see her so unhappy, we didn’t know what to do. She lost weight and was withdrawn. We had to push her back onto the train one day.
“She did not like being away from home. She was her Mammy’s girl. Eventually it was too much and we brought her home altogether.”
Since coming home Natasha became herself again and set about realising her potential. She had no difficulty getting the bus everyday to the Deaf Association in Cork city and is currently studying childcare.
But the stress she endured travelling to Dublin is something Ber would hate to bring on her youngest daughter Rebecca.
“I am dreading the thought of it. . . I could not put her into the school in Dublin. . . she is my baby. When it comes to that stage, I just hope there is school in Cork for her.
“That would be great and for her, to be able to be taught through sign, is so important. She would have a bit of speech but she is very good at sign,” she said.
The mother compares the difficulties of two of her daughters to the smooth transition to second level enjoyed by her middle child, Aideen. She attended schools in Mallow and at 18 years of age finished her Leaving Certificate this month.
She hopes Rebecca will get the chance to match that achievement in 2016. At the moment, she is in second class at St Columba’s school for the deaf in Douglas, on the south side of Cork city.
Her teacher is Sr Pauline who is currently among a team battling to revive secondary school education for the deaf in Cork after more than a decade.
This week discussion will continue to link up with a school in the Cork area in time for September.
However, Sr Pauline said it will need goodwill from all sides and the backing of the Department of Education. She is reluctant to scupper talks by disclosing any details but said the dream is focused on the needs of the children.
“We would be looking for a school that has trained in Irish sign language and have opportunities for integration with mainstream schools in certain subjects,” she said.
It would be modelled on the “school-within-a-school” model it adopts for its 14 pupils in Douglas.
“The way we work is to have some subjects taught in the mainstream school, in things like arts and music, with the support teacher involved as well.
“Then it would come back to this school for the academic subjects which would have to be taught through sign,” said Sr Pauline.
Last Thursday, Deirdre Devlin’s daughter Aoibheann finished fifth class in St Columba’s. Like Ber, Deirdre is glowing in her praise of the education her child gets.
“From the first day, Aoibheann was happy out and we never looked back. It works really, really well.
“There is nothing they don’t do and they are treated the exact same as the other 700 or so kids in the mainstream part of the school.
“For instance, Aoibheann does piano lessons and at first you would kind of be wondering why is she doing that when she is deaf, but then you realise if everyone else is doing it and she can do it then why shouldn’t she. They just have a great way of doing things,” she said.
Deirdre knows the time is fast approaching when she will have to decide on a secondary school and she is already shepherding Aoibheann’s expectations.
“All she talks about is that ‘when I am big, I am going to Dublin’ and she is excited but she does not realise what it is really like to be away from home from Monday to Friday.”
Like many parents across the country, it is a heart-wrenching dilemma.
“If she goes to a mainstream school, she is not going to get a proper education.
“The local school in Carrigtwohill is very good, but it would still not be for Aoibheann. She would have to bring a specialist adult teacher in with her and children don’t want that — they don’t want to be made to feel different,” she said of the options in Cork.
The other alternative is to enrol in St Mary’s.
“The Dublin school is better, all the parents say the education is great and they really look after the children, but it is so far away and we would miss out on so much.
“What do you do as a parent? On one hand you have a really good school in Dublin or you have them at home knowing they won’t get the same chance,” she said.
The maternal torment of Ber Foley and Deirdre Devlin is not new.
Kevin Stanley’s wife left Cork in 1979 at the same age and for the same reasons.
Now Mr Stanley is Programme development manager for the Irish Deaf Society and said there remained widespread frustration at the way in which education for deaf people was handled in Ireland.
“We have full empathy with the dilemma of parents from Cork in sending deaf children to school in Dublin.
“Parting with any children, let alone the deaf, to a school far away can be hard on any parents. I am a parent of three children and I can imagine how they feel,” he said.
He believes deaf people are not reaching their potential, because they are being shoehorned into mainstream schools without sufficient support or interaction with other deaf children.
“This problem needs to be addressed as a matter of urgency. That is why parents appear to be in the position where they are unsure on what to do and consider what is best for their children.
“It is something that needs to be addressed in the overall context of deaf education reform,” he said.
However, unless the prayers of the deaf lobby are answered, similar warning bells will reverberate for Ber and James Foley as Rebecca approaches secondary school age.
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