Diary of a Gen Z Student: Love Island might give me 'brain rot' but here's why it's my guilty pleasure

It’s probably contributing to the decay of my brain from the inside out, if I’m being honest with myself. Even so, by 9pm every night, I am sat with a cup of tea, brimming with anticipation to catch up on the goings on in that fateful villa

This season's love island OGs. Picture: Love Island/ITV.

We all do things that we know aren’t good for us. Drinking alcohol, doomscrolling on social media, texting that situationship that couldn’t pick you out of a line-up. I like to think of it as just another part of being human. You can’t be perfect all the time. You have to know what the troughs look like if you want to be able to enjoy the peaks, et cetera, et cetera.

All of this is a very poetic way of admitting I am obsessed with Love Island. The dating show where influencers are made of, or whatever that lyric is. Basically, a bunch of hotties with little regard for decorum are thrown into a villa in bikinis and Speedos, and we get to watch what unfolds. 

I know it’s not enriching my life. And I know it’s probably contributing to the decay of my brain from the inside out, if I’m being honest with myself. Even so, by 9pm every night, I am sat with a cup of tea, brimming with anticipation to catch up on the goings on of that fateful villa.

The dating show that’s guaranteed to make anyone feel better about their own love life: there’s a reason it’s so popular. You’ll watch Aidan repeatedly use the wrong name when talking to the girl he’s in a couple with. Or you’ll watch Tommy kiss Ellie, then beg Priya for a kiss a few hours later, then bring Namibia to the terrace for a secret kiss a few minutes after that, and sign things off by telling Ellie that he only has eyes for her.

The intricacies of it would make your head spin. I’ve often found myself rewinding the show during key arguments, just to make sure I didn’t miss anything, and can come to my prevailing (admittedly, biased) verdict on the show: the boys should do better. 

One thing’s for sure, by the end of an episode, you can rest easy in the knowledge that your love life certainly could be worse. You could be dating a boy who thinks making a coffee is the same as an apology.

Seán Fitzgerald is a Galway GAA player who is taking part in this season of the dating show.

While the villa politics would be likely to send any sane person round the bend, there is also something profoundly entertaining about it all. It’s like everyone is 14 again at times. The kissing is reminiscent of a teen disco. Running around like they’re experiencing freedom for the first time. Pulling someone up to the terrace for a chat is their slightly more evolved version of teen boys lurking behind failsafe "Will you shift my mate?" That first kiss in the villa is a lifetime milestone, and they all act like their granny isn’t at home, watching in horror.

There’s just so much to love about the show. Every year, the Irish contestants will keep me invested in the villa. And this year is no different. Watching Fitzy, the GAA player from Galway, getting loved up with an English girl has proved very entertaining. 

She recently told him she was obsessed with Victoria Beckham as a child and has always wanted to be a WAG. Watching that conversation, I couldn’t help but pity the poor thing. Little does she know that GAA is amateur. But he’ll be training like he’s getting ready for the World Cup. 

And the closest she’ll get to Victoria Beckham’s life will be watching a match in the pelting rain in the back of beyond. Someone needs to tell her before it’s too late.

I get it if you’re not convinced about the entertainment value of the show. When it comes to reality television, plenty of people just don’t get it. They’ll ask why the participants don’t have ‘real’ jobs. 

They might even bring up the fact it’s a bit sad that viewers are willing to invest an hour of their day for eight weeks, to stay up to date on who’s being "pulled for a chat", and who’s betraying "girl code".

But what if I’m actually an anthropologist, using the show as a case study? It’s actually very intellectual if you look at it as a serious academic study of human behaviour. I’m trying to answer big questions here!

How many women will Tommy try to kiss in a given day? How many boys does it take to make an iced coffee? How long until Angelista gives Simba a well-deserved smack? Maybe these are questions for the philosophers, but while they’re catching up on the significance of this dating show, I will battle on.

We all have our vices.