Sex File: He only speaks Spanish in bed and I find it off-putting

An adopted tongue only becomes a "language of the heart" when a person is extremely fluent in speaking it

Picture: iStock 

My new Spanish boyfriend and I communicate well in our day-to-day life, but he always reverts to his mother tongue when we get intimate. I don't speak Spanish and I've asked him not to do this. But he says he can't help himself. It's off-putting to have no idea what he's saying in bed. Is he doing it on purpose?

A lot of people find the idea of sex with someone who speaks another language incredibly sexy. Not being able to understand a sexual partner creates a sense of "otherness" and the tension between physical intimacy and linguistic separation can heighten arousal for both of you.