Sex File: She likes to sext, but avoids sex 

"For cohabiting couples with no children in the house, the chance to down tools and squeeze sex into a lunch break should be an unexpected highlight of lockdown."

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My girlfriend and I work in separate rooms during the day. She often sends me saucy messages, which I love receiving and make me look forward to clocking off. However, by the time we've finished work she never actually wants to have sex. This is confusing.

Sexting is a form of psychological priming. It makes you think about sex, and naturally you then begin to feel aroused. That's the point of it, really. It doesn't even have to be explicit, and in fact can be much more effective when it's subtle and your imagination is forced to fill in the gaps. And in the same way that asking someone not to think about a white bear ensures that white bears invade their thoughts, once your brain is distracted by the possibility of an orgasm it's difficult to think about anything else.