For feck’s sake: There’s no such thing as Patty’s Day

An irritating phenomenon arises without fail each year in the run up to March 17.

Poor old St Patrick is temporarily banished from vast swathes of the United States as our American cousins pay homage to some imposter called Patty.

Despite being short for Patricia and also moonlighting as hamburger meat, incredibly the Paddy's Day vs Patty's Day debate persists.