I could always ask Chris Martin. I’m sorry, I can’t really help here, I’m one of the few women in Ballinlough who doesn’t feel comfortable talking about her front bottom.
My neighbour Reena said I should see someone about it, I said I am already seeing someone, he’s not a psychologist or anything, but the sex is amazing. #ActionNotWords
My cousin is a complete political anorak, he’s an expert in proportional representation and virginity.
I said, I have a question on behalf of this posh boy running for the Dáil who is totally out of touch with the general population.
He said, you never told me you knew Leo Varadkar.
I’ll warn her. I know your pain. I watched Love Island with my daughter last summer.
She said, why does Maura Higgins keep talking about her fanny flutters?
I said,because she’s from Longford.
My hippy cousin in St Lukes deals with this in her podcast 27 Ways to Devastate Friends With Your Wealth Without Flooding Greenland.
I said, what’s popular in St Lukes? She said on-trend lentils and smugness. #Misunderstanding #TrueThough
I just rang the Posh Cousin there and filled her in on the details.
She said, what’s The Mam’s problem. I said, I suppose she’s afraid that by appearing on the show, she’ll give Passage West a bad reputation.
She said, excuse me while I actually pee myself laughing. (She’s too posh to piss.)