Sex File: My wife says she is bored with our lovemaking

There are all sorts of ways to make sex more exciting, but it all starts with emotional intimacy

Sex takes two, so you are only ever 50% responsible for the state of your sexual relationship. Picture: iStock 

Our sex life has gone off the boil. After a few attempts to broach the subject with my wife she finally admitted she's a bit "bored" by it, which hurt. We're in our 40s, out of the new baby years and otherwise fit and healthy, but she has a high-pressure job. My ego is bruised, and I'm not sure where we go from here.

Describing something as "boring" is a very effective way to dismiss something that you don't particularly want to do. If your wife is under a lot of pressure, having sex probably feels like an additional demand she can't cope with right now.