Sex File: I'm more confident in my body and sexuality but he won't accept the new me

"In fact, I think you might respond in the same way: feeling threatened and interpreting it as a criticism of you and of the sex life that you used to have together."

Mon, 25 Mar, 2024 - 02:00

Suzi Godson

When I entered my fifties I started going on various health retreats that have helped to build my confidence in my body and sexuality. I'm more aware of what I want and happy to ask for it. I thought my husband of 20 years would be delighted, so why is he taking it as a slight on him and our old sex life instead?

To be completely honest I found your question a little bit tricky. My immediate response was to wonder how you would feel if your husband had gone away on a retreat and come back with a suitcase full of ideas about how you should meet his sexual needs. In fact, I think you might respond in the same way: feeling threatened and interpreting it as a criticism of you and of the sex life that you used to have together.