Ask Audrey: 'I cry myself to sleep, thinking about Cillian Murphy buying a place in Dublin'

Sorting out Cork people for ages

Ask Audrey has been sorting Cork people out for ages.

HELLO, it’s Rosealeen, here in Ballydesmond. The lifting of travel restrictions on Monday is a fecking blight on our lives, here on the Cork-and-Kerry border. ’Tis grand for ye lúdramáns inside in Cork City, because ye are more than 20km from any other county, so ye don’t have to put up with slack-jawed bogmen wandering over the border from places like Waterford and Tipperary. 

No such luck for the good folk of north Cork, who have to put up with the Kerry crowd driving across for a gawk at Cork, in an Opel Corsa that’s held together by a piece of twine. I understand now how the people of west Berlin must have felt when the wall came down in 1989 and they noticed the pong of all the traffic across Checkpoint Charlie.