Sharpening my scian for the seanadóirí

The 4,000-year-old Cashel Man’s fossilised remains, the oldest bog body in the world, dating beyond the Bronze Age, are yielding up ancient secrets which are absolutely priceless for me, on the eve of tomorrow’s referendum.

Thank you to experts like Eamonn Kelly, the Keeper of Irish Antiquities, for their knowledge and expertise.

This is not a political article, by any means. This is a personal, malicious article because, armed with the information from the Keeper of the Cashel Man’s contorted remains, I am going to sally forth tomorrow, with my sharp scian of a vote, with the aim of executing every Senator in sight — just as totally as our angry ancestors ritually executed the Cashel Man those many centuries ago. And that is the pure truth.