Seanie Johnston: Being dropped by Cavan, infamous Kildare switch and 'dark times' spent gambling 

EMOTIONAL: Seanie Johnston before the Dr McKenna Cup round 2 match between Cavan and Tyrone at Kingspan Breffni in Cavan last year. Pic: Seb Daly/Sportsfile

Former Cavan captain Seanie Johnston has admitted he regrets his infamous inter-county switch to Kildare, revealing that it was a 'dark time' for him and that he turned to gambling 'crazy amounts of money' for a spell.

Speaking for the first time in detail about the shock transfer to Kieran McGeeney's Lilywhites in 2012, after being dropped by Cavan, Johnston said he actually never felt comfortable playing for his adopted county.

He spent two seasons with the Leinster side, famously coming on and scoring in a 2012 qualifier against his native Cavan, a game he now says he wishes he was left on the bench for.

Speaking on The GAA Social podcast in an at times emotional interview, Johnston said his 'ego was massively hit' after being dropped by Cavan.

"I've probably never gone into the detail of saying that I wasn't okay," said ex-attacker Johnston, who elaborated on what not being okay actually meant. "We're probably talking around it brought me on a course of doing things that I shouldn't have been doing in terms of, eh....gambling being one, to be honest.

"When I was gambling I wasn't thinking of the transfer. I remember I was in a mate of mine's house and he just said, 'Come on, we'll put 15 dollars into a Paddy Power account and we'll play blackjack. And that's what it was, 15 euros or 15 dollars. I lost. 

"I went home and it was back to the 'This isn't going to beat me' mentality and I put 30 euros in and out of nowhere, within I'd say a couple of weeks' time, I remember sitting in the house one night at about half 2 and I had 200 euros on Gael Monfils to beat Victor Troicki in a tennis match and a double with Vasco da Gama to beat a Brazilian soccer team. I was just going, 'I'm in a bit of a hole here'.

"For me, gambling...when I say it's not an issue for me, I don't feel it is an issue for me now, maybe that's naive of me, but I wouldn't go into a bookies, like. But I was playing blackjack for crazy amounts of money. 200 euros a hand. 

"And the problem with online gambling is that it goes out of your account straight away but it doesn't go into it for about three days when you win, so I spent the whole time looking at my online banking account going, 'Oh my God', because it's all going down until eventually you win and that won't go in for a couple of days. Yeah, a dark time I'd say."

Asked if there was a direct link between the transfer and the gambling, Johnston suggested there was.

"Well I can't say that that was the only reason that I did it but in my head at that stage, I was trying to forget stuff I would say and it was giving me an unbelievable buzz, it was amazing and it was dangerous some of the stuff...like, I was doing it in places where you're (not) meant to be doing stuff anyway, like work, everything, going out to the car, bang, not good, not in a good place."

Father-of-four Johnston said he was fortunate not to be left with any debts as a result of the gambling.

"I got very lucky, I'll be absolutely honest - I won a lot of what I lost back, in one big scoop over a day or two days, and I stopped," he said. "The only person that knows about that, my parents wouldn't even know about that, would be my wife. I remember during lockdown...the lockdown scenario brought up where everybody started playing poker online. So you might be over in your house and I would be in my house, and that was grand, we could play on a Friday evening for a fiver. But then I remember she came in one day and I was changing one of the twins' nappies and the laptop was in front of me and she goes, 'No, no'. And I says, 'You're right' and I just took it off.

"Do I have the potential to fall back in? If you started then I think anybody has the potential to fall back in. Obviously I hope that I don't and she's strong enough, she's scary enough to keep me away I think."

Johnston admitted the dark episode had a 'profound effect' on the type of person he is now, ultimately making him a better person in his opinion.

"In my life, in Ireland, in Cavan, this was just a mad time, it was a mad time," said Johnston, who is currently in charge of Monaghan club side Ballybay.

He ultimately returned to play for Cavan, and more recently coached his county, and said it has taken years for him to acknowledge that he shouldn't have pushed through the move to Kildare.

"I think the most important point for me to say, and it's probably something I haven't been forthcoming enough with, is to say that looking back now, I was wrong in a lot of things I did and it's probably taken until, well, it's taken me until nearly 2023 to admit it," said Johnston.

"At that stage, I was 25 or 26 years of age at time, I had worked my backside off, in my head, to be the best player I could possibly be and I got too big for my boots, is the first main thing I would like to say.

"I was hurt, I was badly hurt and my ego was massively hit I would say. Then you get into a situation where things start spiralling."

*The full interview with Seanie Johnston is available on the latest edition of The GAA Social podcast.