How deep our owners will dig now the question

YOU don’t fool us that easily.

They’re trying to break our hearts anew with a sliver of hope it won’t be 18-19 in a few weeks’ time, but our guard is up. As king of the paranoiacs I love a conspiracy theory. Ever since 1989 and Michael Thomas it has been my contention that the powers that be tamper with the fixture list for maximum drama and, maximum profit.

The United-Chelsea game seems to come later every year. Why don’t they just hold it at Wembley in June and have done with it? I’ll stop short of saying the games themselves are rigged, but United’s goals drying up, a Chelsea anchored by Torres still steaming through, their ludicrous goals against Spurs and Arsenal finding a spine from somewhere? Hmmmm. Not that it’s any of our business obviously, though our top statisticians are conducting their own experiments. The slyest amongst us erase Kenny’s first few games and multiply upwards to a 38-game haul.

Result? Liverpool walking the league. Hurrah! Added to the communal fume about the 86 points from 2009 and somehow we manage to inflict psychic trauma upon ourselves even during a time of peace and plenty.

Unless Fenway Sports Group has a death wish, Kenny will be the manager on a permanent basis. The stock of Porto’s Villas Boas rises weekly but to the extent that the financial superpowers will dominate the upcoming auction whilst we go about our business quietly and methodically with the King.

For now there is only speculation on how deep our owners are prepared to dig in order to regain hegemony. It won’t be City-style extravagance, but the figures vary.

Back to the weekend and another good win at home against mid-table opposition. Our previous reluctance to go at teams means an appalling loss of points against the bottom 10.

There was still an unnerving period between the first and second goals though. Thankfully Barton was too busy messing with Kop heads to deliver anything decent. What an oddball he is.

Everyone who excelled against Birmingham did so again with the exception of Flanagan, who had his first real test.

A conniving winger and a gullible referee did him no favours. Carragher showed true leadership there, both with the youngster and the official.

If I mention Suarez again people will think I’ve turned. So I won’t (he’s ace though, isn’t he?) Fifth eh? You sack a manager because you’re sweating over relegation and four months later you’re speculating about a Man City collapse.

Easy, tiger. Pundits dismiss the Europa and imply Tottenham and Liverpool should do their best to avoid it, but once you start manipulating team selection and giving less than 100% you can break that which got you there. It’s bad enough we have to stop for the summer.