Shades of Orwell as Kenny tries to duck sacking story

THE two faces of Simon Coveney clearly had poor little Richard Bruton running scared.

The Jobs Minister had wanted to do his good news announcement in the sunshine across the road from his office, but handlers spotted a couple of animal rights’ demonstrators wearing cut-out Coveney masks lurking by the Agriculture Department and, fearing a very weird photo-bomb, moved the stunt inside.

Interestingly, they plonked Mr Bruton down beside his ministry’s very own Room 101, which brought all sorts of Orwellian imagery to mind.

In Ninety Eighty-Four, Room 101 is the torture chamber in the Ministry of Love where the ruling party subjects prisoners who dare challenge the all dominant state to their worst fears or nightmare.

So, in Mr Bruton’s case, we can probably rule out his Room 101 containing his very own Big Brother, sorry, big brother, John.

But what would be lurking in this Government’s Room 101 at present?

Ah, yes, off course — Alan Shatter.

Much to Enda Kenny’s irritation, Mr Shatter has no intention of going quietly into the night after being caste-out of the Taoiseach’s inner circle.

Hell hath no fury like a Shatter scorned it would seem as the former justice minister has taken to the courts to get a judicial review into the probe by Sean Guerin which finally did for him.

Mr Shatter is most miffed that he was not interviewed by Mr Guerin, and is angry about the “indecent haste” of the investigation.

Leaving aside the intriguing matter of what turns mere haste into “indecent” haste — presumably Mr Guerin did not write his report in the nude — Mr Shatter has effectively taken his former Cabinet buddies to court as it was Mr Kenny who ordered the review and set its terms of reference.

This is a highly dangerous state of affairs for Mr Kenny, as while the Taoiseach refuses to tell us what exactly happened on the night of March 24 when he dispatched the justice department’s secretary general, Brian Purcell, to the home of then garda commissioner Martin Callinan under cover of darkness to express his displeasure, perhaps Mr Shatter might now feel willing to offer his ringside recollections on the build-up to Callinan’s ‘resignation’?

We are certainly not going to hear a peep out of Mr Purcell who refused to discuss the matter when called before the Oireachtas justice committee.

And despite a damning report into how the justice department operated, Mr Purcell keeps his €200,000 salary and is merely moved sideways.

Mr Kenny says he did not fire Mr Callinan; he has repeatedly told the Dáil this but, strangely, he will not tell us what really did happen.

Opposition TDs insist Mr Kenny did sack Callinan and has therefore lied to parliament about the affair — a clear trigger for his own resignation if proved as legally only a Cabinet decision can sack a commissioner.

Indeed, Cabinet Minister Alex White has effectively said Mr Kenny lied to parliament.

But that was when Labour leadership loser White was desperate for votes and attention in the battle against Joan Burton.

Suddenly, White does not seem so concerned about a Taoiseach firing a commissioner and then misleading parliament about it.

Indeed, Mr White said he did not raise the matter with Mr Kenny when he accepted the plum Communications post in Mr Kenny’s Cabinet. Curious.

Mr Bruton’s photo-op was a fluffy, aspirational thing to show how the Government intended to attract foreign direct investment to these shores, but questioning soon turned from job creation to job losses — particularly on how Mr Callinan lost his job.

The Jobs Minister insists the Taoiseach has “nothing to hide”.

Which begs the question: Why is he going out of his way to make it look like he is hiding something then, Richard?

Why won’t he just tell us what happened rather than hide behind the Fennelly inquiry, which is tasked with probing a wide-range of issues, and may not report before the next general election?

Mr Kenny seems to want to have everything all ways.

The Taoiseach told Fianna Fáil leader Micheal Martin in the Dáil: “I don’t take any solace from what you say that you accuse me in here of being a liar and going around sacking garda commissioners”.

But he refuses to say publicly what he told Purcell to tell Callinan which led to the commissioner’s ousting just a few hours later.

The George Orwell classic is replete with punchy quotes that could sum-up Mr Kenny’s strange stance on the Callinan affair.

“He who controls the past controls the future. He who controls the present controls the past.”

Or: “If you want to keep a secret, you must also hide it from yourself.”

And what about: “Doublethink means the power of holding two contradictory beliefs in one’s mind simultaneously, and accepting both of them.”

Mr Bruton’s big idea to pitch Ireland to multinational companies was to promote the country as a “great place to live”.

Hey, here’s a crazy idea to rebrand Ireland as an attractive destination — why not make it clear to foreigners this is not a country where the prime minister lies to parliament by getting Mr Kenny to finally say what happened on that fateful night in March?

In the novel, Winston Smith’s torturer O’Brien tells him: “You asked me once, what was in Room 101. I told you that you knew the answer already. Everyone knows it. The thing that is in Room 101 is the worst thing in the world.”

Now, a prime minister firing a police chief and then misleading parliament about it is not quite the worst thing in the world, but it is pretty bad nonetheless and would lead to a very ugly end to Mr Kenny’s career.

Maybe Mr Shatter could pop out of Room 101 and tell us the truth about what really happened because clearly, for whatever reasons, Mr Purcell and Mr Kenny are in no hurry to do so?