Ahernia — where the trains run on time and Father Ted is banned

HERE’S a little taste of things to come in 2006. Don’t let it spoil your holidays — it might never happen!

JANUARY

The Minister for Justice announces that, in pursuit of the mission given to him by Article 40 of the Constitution to "ensure that organs of public opinion, such as the radio, the press, the cinema shall not be used to undermine public order or morality or the authority of the State," he will be keeping a careful eye on things from now on. As an earnest of his intentions, he decides that Network 2 is to be refused permission to show repeats of Father Ted because it undermines public morality, especially Father Jack's use of the word 'feck'.