Parents calling helpline over abuse
New figures show that abuse, such as child abuse or where the child is abusing the parent, accounted for 11% of all calls to Parentline in the last 12 months.
Family matters, including marriage breakdown, domestic violence and legal issues, such as custody, accounted for 9% of calls.
More than one fifth (22%) of calls related to “teenage issues” such as anger, aggression, discipline and staying out late. And 8% of parents who called the helpline said their teenage children were out of control.
Parentline chief executive Rita O’Reilly said the figures showed a need for support services for parents facing increased pressures in their daily lives, particularly due to the economic downturn.
Ms O’Reilly also said more work was needed in order to identify and respond to the specific needs of an increasing number of parents who find they have no one to turn to.
She pointed out that the number of calls from parents gradually increased when their children became teenagers, spiked at 16 years and dropped dramatically after they reached 18.
The analysis of calls to Parentline in the last year shows that more than 4,000 families were supported by the service, an increase of more than 100 on 2010 figures.
It also shows that mothers are far more likely to use the 30-year-old support service than fathers, as 82% of calls in the last year were from women, compared to just 18% from men, who are being encouraged to use the service more.
Of the calls received, 7% concerned addiction issues, with 3% reporting their children had alcohol problems. Another 3% said they were worried about their children’s use of drugs.
About 2% of calls were from parents worried over child access issues.
Mental health also proved a worry, with 3% of callers saying they suffered from depression and 6% from stress.
The survey is published today at the start of Parents’ Week, which is organised by Parentline and supported by Ulster Bank to celebrate the valuable and rewarding job that parents do and highlight the support that is there for them to offload stress.
Ms O’Reilly said parents should not shy away from discussing issues with children at home but should avoid over-burdening them with their own problems.
“We encourage parents to explain to their children why they are feeling stressed and what can be done to improve matters,” said Ms O’Reilly.
*Parentline helpline 1890 927277. www.parentline.ie.
* Parent through love, not fear.
* Give time and attention to your child.
* Change tack. If your method of dealing with a situation is not working, try another way of dealing with it.
* Offer choices. Give your children choices and let them be involved in decision-making. This builds confidence.
* Encourage independence. Ask yourself: “What’s the worst that can happen, if I don’t interfere?”
* Communicate. Discuss clearly the behaviour acceptable to you and your child and agree on the consequences if they do not comply with the rules.
* Negotiate. Have some give and take.
* Take time out. Deal with the issues when both of you are calm.
* Separate the person from the behaviour. Ensure the child knows he/she is loved and accepted and emphasise it is the behaviour that is unacceptable.
* Remember everybody is learning — the child and the parent. Nobody can get every thing perfect always.
CONNECT WITH US TODAY
Be the first to know the latest news and updates
