No one willing to cast first stone in Dáil full of kickback sinners

“LIVE from his no-expense-spared tour of London, Kerry and Cannes, heeeeere’s the rock n’ roll Ceann Comhairle – Johnny Junket!”

Embattled ex-minister John O’Donoghue was still humming his tired old tune The Sound of Silence yesterday as his lavish taxpayer-funded lifestyle while in Cabinet was compared in opulence to that which could only be afforded by the likes of Bono and John Bon Jovi.

But unlike Bon Jovi, Mr O’Donoghue did not need to be living on a prayer while he was arts, sports and tourism minister as he was living on an expense account that saw him slide from limo to Lear jet to luxury suite all thanks to the endless generosity of the little people back home.