Chips are down as lady luck leaves Bertie in the lurch

YOU don’t know who your friends are until the chips are down — but unfortunately for Bertie Ahern the chips in question are the ones earmarked for that mysterious Phoenix Park casino scheme.

With the latest swirl of claims and counterclaims spilling out of the Mahon Tribunal beginning to spin with the frenzy of a roulette wheel, who now would bet on the Taoiseach’s long- term future?

Certainly not Labour leader Eamon Gilmore who circled the most successful taoiseach for half a century during Leader’s Questions as if Mr Ahern was nothing better than wounded prey.

The Taoiseach did not care for the implicit comparison and fought back so sharply it sparked a series of bust-ups across the chamber.

The sight was more reminiscent of an international rules grudge match than the Dáil as referee John O’Donoghue was overwhelmed by the wave of localised aggression erupting across the pitch.

Despite the venom of their exchanges — “Is Deputy Gilmore deaf as well as stupid?” being one of the more statesmanlike remarks — the Taoiseach and Labour leader were soon too busy settling other scores to bother addressing each other at all, as they instead became embroiled in bitter side rows.

Ruairí Quinn continually tried to shout down the Taoiseach, demanding: “What are you hiding?”

Anger momentarily gave way to puzzlement on the Taoiseach’s face as he struggled to pinpoint exactly which one of the myriad sleaze allegations the Labour TD was referring to before hedging his bets by replying: “About what?”

It was an exchange worthy of Oscar Wilde compared to the juvenility of Mr Gilmore’s simultaneous spat with Dermot Ahern.

“Deputy Gilmore is a twister!” the Foreign Minister exclaimed before being told by the Labour leader to go back “up on the top of whatever tree he climbed” in a reference to previous Fianna Fáil unpleasantness.

“Deputy Gilmore should go back to producing money,” the Cabinet minister spat out in an apparent tilt at the old Workers Party and a printing press.

Neither man came out of the ugliness well, but as the Ceann Comhairle eventually restored order Mr Gilmore could not help a devilish smirk spreading across his face as he reflected that once again he had lit Bertie’s blue touch paper and stood back while the Taoiseach exploded.

It’s the usual run of the cards these days as lady luck seems to have deserted Bertie as suddenly as some of his close pals, with Mr Ahern developing a dangerous knack of turning friends into enemies — Bertie’s frenemies.

The Taoiseach may still claim to be best buddies with Pádraic O’Connor, but the NCB boss’s insistence the £5,000 he gave to Des Richardson via a false invoice was intended for FF and not Bertie’s bank account, would seem to throw the closeness of his relationship with Mr Ahern into the starkest contrast. Super loyal ex-FF fundraiser Mr Richardson was then immediately demoted to frenemy status by a terse Taoiseach as the unusual way in which the money reached him was revealed.

Will today be Bertie’s last budget? All bets are off.