Advice for teens of separated parents
The Teen Between program, which was set up in the wake of the 1995 divorce referendum, provides counselling services to affected teenagers.
“We have got an increase in funding and that is in response to the need. The rate of divorce is rising and many young people are being affected,” said co-ordinator Claire Missen.
Almost 12,000 couples have been granted divorces by Irish courts, although the overall rate of marriage breakdown, including legal separations, is relatively low by international standards, at one in eight marriages.
Teen Between deals with teenagers who often feel powerless because they cannot intervene or solve the martial dispute. They can also feel angry, hurt or depressed.
The counsellors provides teenagers with a neutral listener, who can be told what the separated parents can’t.
They also teach teenagers alternative methods of expressing their anger such as hitting a punchbag, kicking a football around or writing a diary.
She said that the service helped teenagers involved to avoid some of the pitfalls.
“Children are expressing feelings of loss and separation and that can knock their self-esteem or make them very angry. The ones who are angry can get into trouble in school or with the police. One of the possible effects for girls is that they become more sexually aware, leading to early pregnancy and school leaving.” said Ms Missen.
Around 1,500 young people have used the service since it was set up and Ms Missen believes it has given them a more positive view of long term relationships.
The Teen Between service insists that teenagers under 18 must have the consent of at least one parent to attend. The counselling remains confidential except in cases where the young person admits to being at risk of physical or sexual abuse.
However, there is a waiting list of around eight weeks in Dublin for the service and Ms Missen said the recent increases in funding from the Department of Social and Family Affairs need to continue.
Teen Between has linked up with the National Youth Federation to provide weekly counselling sessions in Dublin, Louth, Cork, Tipperary, Galway, Sligo, Roscommon, Monaghan and Donegal. Clare, Limerick and Leitrim will join the service shortly.
Details of counselling locations are available from Teen Between at 01 6785256
