Dear Dáithí: I feel overdressed going out. Is the dress code too casual?

As much as I love GAA shorts, made more famous in recent years by Paul Mescal, with the legs I have, I wouldn't get away with them outside the football field, says Dáithí. 

Dear Dáithí,

Is it just me, or has the dress code for going out become too casual?

I have young-ish children, so I’ll admit, I haven’t been out very often over the last few years.

Typically, if I was going for dinner or to a play or a gig, I’d have worn a shirt with nice jeans or chinos, and some shoes.

My kids are getting a bit older, and so I’ve had more opportunities to get out with my partner. The last few times we’ve gone out, I’ve actually felt really overdressed. I was at a show recently, and some of the audience members were wearing GAA shorts with shirts and open-toe sandals. I’d say half the men were in shorts. I don’t know if this is an unfortunate byproduct of the recent hot weather, or if people just don’t get dressed up anymore.

I hope it’s not the latter, as I think it’s nice to get dressed up and have a sense of occasion. I remember a time when you couldn’t get into a club with runners on. Now, you’d be hard-pressed to see someone not wearing runners on a night out. How long before we see people wearing tracksuits or pyjamas at a restaurant?

OH, I AM totally with you when it comes to people and the way they dress these days, but I do have to remind myself of a few things.

Firstly, people can dress as they please and to have the freedom to do this is very important, as we know there are places in this world where people can’t do this. In that sense, we are in a good place and should be grateful.

Secondly, I wouldn’t want anyone to tell me what to wear and when to wear it. People have different tastes in clothes and also very different budgets, and we must remember that not everyone can be dressed in Gucci.

All that said, I know where you’re coming from.

I do think in general that people do take a more relaxed view of what they wear these days. You do see a lot of younger folks in grey tracksuit pants and a sports top.

What’s wrong with that, says you? Nothing really, except everyone seems to look the same now. We wore a tracksuit for training, and we had jeans for walking around. Now, we only had two pairs of pants, but we wore them all the time. We had no money at all. There seems to be more money spent on clothes nowadays, but you wouldn’t think it by looking around.

It’s very important that we don’t get mixed up between a personal style and laziness, but it can be hard to differentiate between them sometimes.

I’ve no problem with people having a style, we all have one; but laziness, that just gets me. You know when you look at someone, and they look like an unmade bed, and you say: ‘Why couldn’t they have made an effort?”. Then again, and I often say it, we just don’t know what is happening in their lives, and we do need to think of that too.

Maybe sometimes it is us that can be wrong for judging! That aside, the pyjamas epidemic is a hard one to swallow. Like, will you put on a pair of pants for the 10 minutes you are out of the house... I’ll say no more about that.

The older generation is really puzzled by all of this. They come from a generation that always dressed well when they were out, they had their ‘Sunday best’, and that was used for Mass, funerals, parties, and anything other than work — and they minded those clothes, and they did last a lifetime and were often passed on, too. I even remember people borrowing clothes to go to a wedding; not sure if that’s too common now, I hope it is.

As much as I love GAA shorts — made more famous in recent years by Paul Mescal — with the legs I have, I wouldn’t get away with them outside the football field, but as you say, they are all the go now out in pubs and shows.

Again, this wouldn’t have happened back in the day; I actually don’t think I even saw my father’s legs, now that I think of it. He definitely had them; it’s just they were never on show.

I really don’t mind the GAA shorts, but the open-toe sandals, I’m not too sure...With or without socks? Sin scéal eile!

You asked a good question at the end of your letter about when we will see tracksuits at restaurants; well, my friend, that has been happening for a long time. You can blame the likes of Kim Kardashian and the family for a lot of this.

They were the first that I saw to do it on a world scale, if you like, and it’s those people that got the ball rolling. When people see this, a lot will follow.

Again, at the end of the day, what is really wrong with it? Not a whole pile. It’s just very different to what we were used to, that’s all.

Things are changing, and we will have to change too; we might not like it, but we do.

I’m not sure if I answered your question or even helped at all, but I do completely understand where you’re coming from. I too like to see people dressing well, because I think it’s you minding yourself and taking pride in yourself. I’m always drawn to people who do make an effort in their appearance.

How we present ourselves was always very important to us, and we are still like that, but it might be waning a little in recent years. Maybe we were too formal for too long, and this now is a reaction to that. And that, my friend, is a whole different ball game.

You also mentioned the hot weather and that playing a part; if so, bring back the shorts and the heat!