Listen — Ask Audrey: Joyriding in Fermoy turns on my Model Farm Road princess

Sorting out Cork people for ages

Ask Audrey has been sorting Cork people out for ages.

Hello it’s Rosealeen here in Ballydesmond. Well lads, I’m bisexual and it took an accident to discover it. I’m addicted to this new hyper-realistic dating app called I’m In Your League and didn’t it arrange a dinner date for me inside in Cork city the other night? I got there early as always with a good view of the door, giving me plenty of time to escape through the jacks if your man had the look of a lad with a fine set of toe-jam. 

Well, in walks this one, tall now, like, and a brazen look up on her face and didn’t she sit down at my table with me. I said "sorry, there must be some mistake I’m here to meet Jerry". She said "my name is Geri, G-E-R-I", and I said, "it isn’t your name that’s bothering me really, it’s more that you’re clearly not in possession of a love muscle if you get my drift."