Mum's the Word: celebrating the person on a lockdown birthday

For the past number of weeks, I have been getting hundreds of messages into the show from families celebrating birthdays during lockdown. Everyone is doing their best to remain positive, and come up with creative ways to celebrated their children’s birthdays during this unusual time.

Gone are parties and large gatherings for the moment but birthdays still happen. So how are we coping and adapting with this, to make sure little ones still have a special day?

Most people getting in touch were still having cake and treats, some were hosting movie nights, and others were having games nights. Lots of walks and Zoom calls with other family members, and just making sure the birthday boy or girl feels adored and loved.

Our turn came this past week, to make sure that our daughter Joan had a memorable 9th birthday. Plans that were set in place earlier this year of course were shelved, when news of lockdown came about. From that moment on my husband and I started to look into ways to keep the traditional birthday elements for the big day, with the new restrictions in place.

One of the first things we thought about was how to make other people, family and friends still part of her day without them being able to see Joan. A friend whose son just had his birthday in April told us that they asked everyone to send in video messages, which they put together into a gorgeous collage. So we did the same, and the end result was a lovely, emotional 18 minute mini movie of all of Joan’s favourite people wishing her well. Something she can keep forever!

For food, Joan and I spotted on Instagram unicorn donuts that she really liked the look of. Thankfully the company was still operating during lockdown, and the order was made. On top of this, a friend's extremely talented 11-year-old daughters offered to make Joan a cake, which they delivered on the morning of her birthday. It was a truly stunning creation that didn’t last a day and really added something special to Joan’s birthday.

Thankfully as well, we were able to get our hands on some, not all, of the things Joan wanted for her birthday. The tricky part was keeping the deliveries a secret for a few weeks. We ended up wrapping them in Christmas paper, but needs must, and really, who cares?!

Joan was born at 3:30 in the afternoon, so we asked her best friend who lives across the road, and her good pal who lives next door, to pop their heads out of their houses at that exact moment to sing Happy Birthday. We kept that a surprise, and I could tell it meant so much to Joan. One other close friend did a drive by ‘hello’, which also made her day.

The core values of what it means to celebrate a person, I think, are surfacing more now than ever. Birthdays are being spent with closest family members. There isn’t a rush to get to a cinema, bowling alley, adventure centre or wherever we were spending kids' birthdays. And in many cases the chaos of the day, especially when kids are really young, actually ends up overwhelming them at times.

Also parents feel pressure to do all these amazing things, whereas the most important thing is making sure the birthday child feels loved and appreciated. Lockdown has provided us with a chance to slow the day down, to take more time. To be creative with treats and presents and ways of celebrating. All of which I think is a good thing.

So during this extraordinary time, I think we managed to make a really memorable birthday for our little girl. And I know many other parents are doing the same across the country.