Unsympathetic characters leave you Cold

Cold Mountain, starring Jude Law, opens with the gruesome Battle of the Crater outside Petersburg, Virginia, where Union forces dig a tunnel under the Confederates, pack it with gunpowder, and blow the lot to bits.

The explosion creates a huge hole into which the Union forces charge like headless chickens and are butchered by the surviving rebels.

Inman (Jude Law), a Confederate soldier, is so shocked by what he sees he decides he’s had enough and heads for home - the Cold Mountain of the title, in South Carolina.

The bloody battle scenes are interspersed with flashbacks to the soldier’s former life with girlfriend Ada (Nicole Kidman). It’s easy to see why he’s so determined to get home.

While all this has been going on, Ada has had her fair share of suffering. Her father Reverend Monroe (Donald Sutherland) dies, leaving her to run the family farm single-handedly.

She also has to ward off the unwanted attentions of local baddie Teague (Ray Winstone) and his gang of cutthroats. It’s a job she’s ill-equipped for but she’s helped along the way by the no-nonsense Ruby (Rene Zellweger).

This is a tough outing for both Jude Law and Nicole Kidman, who are saddled with characters who are very hard to like.

Inman is a man of few words so that we’re never quite sure what he’s thinking, while Ada is your classic, made-for-film Southern belle.

The film’s most irritating feature is the accents. Despite the big pay cheques, none of the stars manages to muster a decent Southern accent.

Brendan Gleeson, who plays Ruby’s father, is about the worst, but Kidman runs a close second.

Cold Mountain is just about passable, but it could have been oh so much better!

Drama, 15. 2/5