Mafia yarn fails to thrill

Federal Protection is the story of former Mafia lieutenant Frank Carbone (Armand Assante) who is betrayed by his friends, narrowly escapes assassination, turns stoolie, and ends up in Arkansas courtesy of the FBI’s witness protection programme.

Unfortunately for Frank, his new neighbours, including two sultry sisters played by Angela Featherstone and Dina Meyer, figure out who he is after only a week in suburbia, and pretty soon everyone’s falling all over themselves to turn him in for the million-dollar contract on offer.

Thus begins a story of spiralling silliness in which one sister heads off to Chicago to extort some money from the mob, while the weepy one finds solace in the arms of the FBI’s favourite stoolie.

If you can predict that both sisters, several Italian gunmen, and two dozen cops eventually converge in one spot and kill some from each group, then you’ve also seen the half-dozen films that Federal Protection borrows from mercilessly.

Despite the plot deficiencies, director Anthony Hickox keeps the whole thing running along at a brisk clip and manages to deliver a surprise or two along the way.

Thriller, 18. **