Cross-dressing may come as a shock to your wife

Q. I am 34 years old and am I in a loving long-term relationship. For about the past two years I have been dressing in my partner’s underwear whenever she is away.

I am deeply ashamed of this but find I am hooked on the sexual thrill it gives me. What should I do?

A. You have raised the issue of cross-dressing. It seems you are wearing your partner’s underwear for erotic pleasure. The underwear provides stimulation which gives sexual satisfaction. Many cross-dressers are heterosexual males who are married or in meaningful relationships. It is hard to know the reason why some men cross-dress. In some cases it started in childhood when a boy or teenager self soothes with some item of clothing, maybe belonging to a sister or his mother. It is not easy to find a reason and to understand the behaviour. But it is widespread and generally secretive.