Sex File: Why doesn't he want to have sex as much as I do?

My wonderful new man has all the qualities my ex lacked — except his libido is much lower than mine. Should I move on?

You clearly equate having sex with feeling loved, but that is a fairly limited view of intimacy. Picture: iStock 

My marriage ended three years ago and although it had many problems, our sex life wasn’t one. Last year, I met a wonderful new man, also mid-50s, with all the qualities my ex lacked — except his libido is much lower than mine. I know he loves me, my kids love him and I don’t want to lose him, but it’s hard for me to feel loved when he doesn’t want as much intimacy as I do. Have I got my priorities wrong or should I move on?

Your letter is so full of contradictions it is hard to know where to start. Your troubled marriage ended because your husband lacked the qualities that your wonderful new man has in abundance, yet you are thinking of ending this relationship because your partner lacks the one attribute you rated in your husband.