Sex File: My wife has lost a lot of weight and looks great — but now I feel self-conscious

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My wife and I are in our late fifties with two grown-up children. We had both gained quite a bit of weight over the years, but after joining a local gym and changing her diet she has lost 3.5st and never looked better. I'm happy for her, but her new body has started to make me feel self-conscious about my own. What should I do?

Weight loss is basic maths: fewer calories in added to more calories out equals seeing your toes for the first time in years. It is so obvious, yet while everyone knows what they "ought" to do to lose weight, very few people are able to do it. Your wife has worked very hard and I am sure she looks and feels much better, but don't assume that it will have any impact on how she sees you. She is on her own journey and is, I suspect, much more focused on her own body than marginal changes in your girth.