Alison Curtis: The loss of a pet is huge - we are heartbroken we've lost a part of our family

Alison Curtis: My sister's dog had to be put to sleep and we are heartbroken. Pic: Marc O'Sullivan

We lost a very important member of our family last week. My sister came to the heartbreaking decision to put her companion of nearly 10 years to sleep. Her adorable dog Tadoo, my nephew, was the sweetest most gentle little Shiba Inu she rescued from a horrible life in 2012.

Sadly over the past few weeks, his health declined to the point where he wasn’t able to eat on his own and his back legs were no longer able to support him.

The loss of a furry family member is immense. Some people might not understand the impact it can have on people or the depth of grief that comes with the pet passing. But it is huge and my family and I have been mourning him all week.

Tadoo was my twin sister Karen’s main companion for nearly 10 years. He was her baby. He was a nervous little guy with a lot of quirks, like not being able to go upstairs. He never barked, bit or growled. He was constantly gentle no matter what was expected of him.

My sister could never leave the house without being stopped by someone admiring him. I always had this experience myself if I was waiting with him while she went into a shop or walking him myself. People always had to stop and ask about him.

He was red golden, a little chubby in later years, and looked like a happy little fox. 

He was built more for comfort than speed and wouldn’t know what you wanted him to do if you threw a ball in his direction. 

He was always on the hunt for “treats” and was in typical Shiba fashion, a little bit fussy.

My sister cared for him as I’ve never seen anyone treat a dog. I regret it now but I often teased her about how much she catered to him or fretted about him. But I understand why she did. He had an awful start to life and she wanted to make up for those years. Plus it’s in her nature to be extremely caring.

She got huge enjoyment out of him. He was always with her and a great comfort to her.

Tadoo was adopted by my twin when my daughter Joan was just one, therefore she has no memory of life without him. As I have written before in the column, unfortunately, Joan has had a long and complicated relationship with dogs. It swings from utter fear to total adoring. It is unpredictable like a lot of phobias and fears but one thing within all of this for Joan that was a constant was Tadoo.

She never feared him she was always happy to be near him. When we were in Canada for our holidays she was usually found beside him. She wanted to feed him, walk him and have him in the bed with her at night. She kissed him endlessly and he never showed signs of being irritated or having had enough.

The night before my sister took Tadoo to be put to sleep was one of the saddest in many years. We Facetimed her so we could say goodbye. 

One thing I think that will live in my memory for a long, long time is Joan trying to get out the words through her tears. “Good-bye Tadoo.” 

He mattered a lot to Joan, he mattered a lot to all of us. It is a loss, and our grieving is natural. We need to support my sister in her grief, acknowledge it for what it is and know that in these situations that time really is the only healer.

One thing I think brought Joan comfort this week is when she asked why she couldn’t stop crying I simply said it's because you loved him so so much.