WE won’t be returning to Pride Park (named by the world’s foremost satirist) any time soon.

HE’S great, Euro-Rafa. Never doubted him for a second. But at the weekend, Anglo-Rafa failed once more.

SO RUN that shortlist of candidates by us again. Fickle? Me? Because although last night was a convincing reprieve, after the Reading debacle, and the visit of the Devil’s own spawn producing its usual grotesque charade, we could still be looking for a new boss.

SO that’s it?

THOSE idiots who said England were a certainty for Euro 2008 — how stupid must they feel, eh?

I’M indebted to the kind soul who inquired after my health recently.

SEE what happens, when you let the opposition worry about you for a change?

MAYBE we should all wean ourselves off cup football? Having somehow persuaded the public to pay high prices for reserve matches in all but name, United upped the stakes in scandalous fashion by extracting money from people’s accounts for games they weren’t actually interested in.

WE knew Everton’s reaction would be bad, but they surpassed themselves.

WHAT’S Spanish for “get out of jail” or “daylight robbery”? While my Mancunian colleague opens his bumper book of quips let’s crack on. Even by derby standards, where sanity seldom surfaces, Saturday was weird.