More groans than crackers in the Christmas joke poll by UKTV’s comedy channel Gold

Ed Miliband may have lost the UK general election, but he has come top of a poll of festive funnies this year.

The former Labour leader’s political defeat, Jeremy Clarkson’s infamous punch-up, and the Volkswagen emissions scandal all made the list after a search for the best modern Christmas cracker jokes.

In a bid to keep the gags short and snappy, entrants who fancied themselves as comedians submitted their offerings on Twitter and 2,000 British adults voted for their favourites.