Should Manchester United appoint Arsene Wenger on a temporary basis? Why not

As one Twitter wag put it, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer would’ve been sacked three times by Watford in the first half alone.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer: Who will replace the now former Man United manager

The end for Ole

So this is how it was destined to finish. A 4-1 thrashing by a team that hadn’t won since the first day of the season. By the end, Watford fans were just laughing at Ole Gunnar Solskjaer.

As one Twitter wag put it, he would’ve been sacked three times by Watford in the first half alone.

The first period was an utterly shambolic, error-strewn display from United. A display that was far below the standard of the players. Again.

If the best teams are greater than the sum of their parts, Manchester United have been far, far less under Solskjaer.

Their manager had his nose further rubbed in his own inadequacy when Donny van de Beek (who was one of the most coveted midfielders in Europe when he signed) came on, played well and scored a goal, thus proving that their hapless manager was wrong to sideline him. Maguire’s sending off for an almost laughable blundering second yellow was almost sad.

Afterwards David De Gea, understandably grim, said: “We don’t know what to do with the ball, we don’t know how to defend properly.”

You had to feel for the manager. It wasn’t his fault he’d been given a job he couldn’t do. The sack had to come and finally came the news Ole was no longer at the wheel. It must be a relief to him.

What is United’s philosophy?

Before the United board decides on a permanent replacement for Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, they need to make a decision on what their long-term strategy is.

The club has been run on an ad hoc basis for three years or more, basically making it up as they went along, both on the pitch and off it. They have no style, no identity. They need to stop running the club like it’s a sports store and more like it’s a huge football club.

Alex Ferguson’s long tenure was an outlier, a freak and not necessarily the ideal template to follow now in 2021. There is no automatic virtue in keeping the same manager for long periods.

Chelsea’s permanent revolution of management has seen them win more trophies than anyone else in the last 20 years.

Indeed it is pointless to think there will ever be another Ferguson and therefore pointless to look for the next Ferguson.

The United board needs to accept that, get a top notch director of football in place to maintain continuity and cohesion through future appointments and stop living from day to day like total amateurs.

The interim man

With United’s board declaring they want an interim manager to take them to the end of the season, while they presumably prise a manager out of his current position, that means they have to appoint someone from within such as Mike Phelan or Michael Carrick, but the fans will not be happy with that sort of mediocrity for the next six months. They are part of the failed regime.

Can they just write the season off? Not really. But getting someone to do the job on such a short-term basis is tricky.

You need someone older who is in semi-retirement. Neil Warnock would be a hilarious choice, Roy Hodgson a sensible custodian.

But if they have any ambition to win something, why not appoint Arsene Wenger?

He’s not doing anything useful except making up nonsense about a World Cup every two years.

He’d be a wise old head, and would get them organised but, at his age, would be no threat to the incoming new man.

But does the board have the imagination to make such an appointment? There’s no evidence they do.

The runners and riders

So who is next? With no planning in place, they have made such a poor fist of running the club and by holding onto Solskjaer for too long have missed a lot of good managers.

Antonio Conte wanted the job and would have had the authority required to be in charge of such a huge club, but they did nothing. It’s a job that can and has crushed people before now.

The almost permanently terrified look on David Moyes face when in charge should not be forgotten.

Mauricio Pochettino is known to be interested but how good is he, given he was trophyless at Spurs, and couldn’t win the French league with PSG? It’s feared he’s not handling the big names very well and all United are all big names.

Brendan Rodgers has the ego to do it and his time at Leicester looks done, but outside of Scotland has just an FA Cup to his name.

Ajax’s Erik ten Hag is an empire builder, but can he manage big names? Zinedine Zidane isn’t interested. Diego Simeone is talked about but would he play the sort of attacking football the crowd demands?

Laurent Blanc is being talked of too, but would he be an inspiring appointment? It is easy to see the problems with any candidate, harder to see who is the best fit.

Manchester United’s awful shirt

Along with a new manager, they need a new away shirt.

What on earth are they doing playing their awful version of football in a nasty sky blue patterned shirt that looks like a cheap duvet cover from the pound shop in 1985?

It is an aesthetically criminal and wildly inappropriate creation which makes them look like a budget imitation of Manchester City. Of course their famous red wouldn’t even have clashed with Watford’s yellow, but such details seem to be ignored these days.

It reflects United priorities; more concerned with flogging their ghastly merchandise, made by poor people for a pittance, a long way from Manchester and sold at hugely inflated prices, than they are with playing successful football. A brand more than a team. Urgh.

Liverpool absolutely Liverpool the hell out of Arsenal

Liverpool proved to be irresistible in a way only Liverpool can be. Arsenal, on a 10-match unbeaten run, had no answer to the sheer penetration of the reds vertical aggression. 

In a passionate first half, the two managers went mano-a-mano at one point, though it has to be said Mikel Arteta, the Captain Black lookalike, resembled a pinch-faced angry wee boy shouting at a grown-up. Very amusing. 

The second half was a classic eviscerating Liverpool performance. For about 20 minutes, they pressed Arsenal to death. Sometimes it is as though they just hit the accelerator, say ‘right let’s win this game’ and steamroller an opposition: An unstoppable force. 

Trent Alexander-Arnold was a superb creator-in-chief. Three goals followed and a four nil win was inevitable. The last 10 minutes were perfunctory as though both teams had turned off the light and left the room. There was a gulf in class which showed how far the Gunners, despite being 5th in the league, have yet to travel to become a major force in English football.

Leicester entrench their mid-table mediocrity

At the end of last season, Leicester were fighting with Chelsea for fourth place. That seems a long time ago. Leicester have got significantly worse and have sunk to 12th. 

Poor at set plays, unfocused in defence and predictable going forward, Brendan Rodgers put it down to lack of confidence, but that is a massive oversimplification. 

They only had 30% possession in the first half, lacked any defensive cohesion, gifted a free header for Antonio Rudiger to score and about two minutes later almost conceded another in exactly the same way.

The return of Jonny Evans was supposed to make a difference defensively but it hasn’t. 

With Brendan Rodgers being talked about as the next boss of Manchester United, winning just two of the last nine extended will do him no favours. The side looks short of ideas and has lost its cutting edge at the same time they have become defensively fractured, which, perhaps significantly, smacks of Rodgers final months at Liverpool.

Newcastle United hit rock bottom

Sometimes it is as if God is angry at Newcastle United. First their new manager was ousted from the dug out by a positive Covid test and then Jamal Lascelles scored their first goal; a man whose first name so vividly evokes the dismembering buzz of the bonesaw.

The game showed Eddie Howe what a difficult task he has. The draw drops them to rock bottom position. Defensively they’re totally AWOL which when combined with reckless attacking, will likely make for some high-scoring games, but few wins. 

Brentford looked like a side who knew what they were doing, or trying to do. They didn’t display a lot of quality, but there was a system there which just about held everything together to come away with a point. If both are fighting it out to stay in the league come May, it will be no surprise.

Steven Gerrard didn’t inspire on his debut

Usually when a new manager takes over, the players up their game to try and impress the new boss. That didn’t happen at Villa Park, which was a bit odd really, even though Gerrard had only been in situ for a few days. 

Brighton proved obdurate opponents and for long periods of the game Aston Villa looked low on confidence. They lacked ideas, were short on creativity and dynamism but big on being conservative. Somehow, they scored two late goals to win a game that had nil nil written all over it. 

This win made Gerrard explode with such emotion it briefly looked like he could wrestle a bear and win. It made him only the third manager of the last 13 to win his first game in charge of Villa, however, he will need to impose himself on the team quickly because they won’t always win games like this and that could leave the club with the smell of relegation in their nostrils all season long.

Conte makes the difference

It was Antonio Conte’s first game in charge at home and Spurs were booed off at the break, which I think we can assume the new boss was a tad unhappy about. They came out for the second 45 transformed. Here now was a sensational team. 

Somehow he had binned the boring old Spurs in one half-time teamtalk. It was remarkable. Leeds however, were up for a fight on the cobbles and even when they went 2 - 1 down, fought back impressively. VAR ruled against them for a Harry Kane handball. 

With Conte, in complete contrast to his predecessor, revving up to the crowd with exaggerated gestures, a whirlwind wrapped in a hurricane on the touchline, Spurs got the win over the line. Life is going to be fun with Antonio around.