Chelsea jump the gun, Wenger ignores the signs, Lovren malfunctions

Getting in behind the Premier League weekend.

PIC OF THE WEEKEND

***

BIGGEST GUN JUMP

Of course they have since deleted it, but the official Chelsea account got a little ahead of itself after Falcao’s equaliser:

"We have 10 minutes to find a winner. Come on you Blues! #CFCLive"

***

BEST RECREATION OF A CRIME SCENE

***

THE WEEKEND IN GUFF

James Milner closed a chapter at Anfield:

"It’s a disappointing end of the start of the first few games."

Dwight Yorke advised:

"Once you’re on the first yellow, the second one is always going to cause you problems."

Andy Cole reckoned Aleksandar Mitrovic just went out to "endure himself to the fans".

They didn’t have to endure him for long.

Everton won’t thank Jamie Redknapp for padding out their man’s CV:

"Jon Stones has everything; he’s quick, good on the ball and has fantastic pace."

More at @dangerhere

***

TERRACE TALK

Man United fan Richard Kurt: "It’s all down to ‘luck’? Really?! Nothing, then, to do with having a comedy ’keeper who’s missing only the bright red nose? Or a hilariously oafish chump upfront who set new standards for cackfootedness yesterday? And is it ‘unlucky’ that we are still so slow, tedious, and easily beaten back by any English team we face these days? As for the hatful of goals that LVG thinks we could have scored, one can only surmise that the manager must have been the only person inside that dressing room who can still claim to have a lively imagination."

READ MORE

Chelsea fan Trizia Fiorellino: "Regular readers of this column will know my love of Jose verges on the unhinged. That hasn’t changed, but he made a lot of mistakes on Saturday. What we need to try and figure out is whether he made them deliberately or not."

READ MORE

Arsenal fan Bernard Azulay: Without more firepower, or a viable alternative for Coquelin, our squad will be no better equipped to believe themselves capable of beating the likes of Bayern and it’s hard to envisage anything other than the same “nearly men” script that’s sadly become the Arsenal’s trademark.

READ MORE

Liverpol fan Steven Kelly: "One goal after two minutes was enough to shatter every single delusion. It felt troubling when Rodgers selected the same team as against Arsenal. Did West Ham really merit a midfield of Lucas, Can and Milner in it with just Benteke up front? Turns out it wasn’t cautious enough."

READ MORE

BRAZEN ARSENE

Thug Life pic.twitter.com/iGRLjJQIMH

— Transfer News Live (@TNLdotcom) August 29, 2015

TEAM OF THE WEEKEND

Tim Howard (Everton)

String of saves kept Spurs at bay and shut Harry Kane out again.

Winston Reid (West Ham)

While some of Liverpool’s rearguard had a calamitous afternoon, Reid looked assured throughout at Anfield.

Damien Delaney (Crystal Palace)

Came out best from a running battle with Diego Costa.

Ashley Williams (Swansea)

Might have done more for Juan Mata’s goal but otherwise a tour of strength against Manchester United.

Gabriel Paulista (Arsenal)

Largely untroubled against Newcastle but then everything asked of him impeccably.

Manuel Lanzini (West Ham)

Shocked Liverpool early and teased their defence throughout an embarrassing afternoon.

Raheem Sterling (Man City)

Unlocked Watford with the opener and played with a confidence that made him look worth the pricetag.

Yannick Bolasie (Crystal Palace)

But bereavement to one side to terrorise Chelsea from the minute he was introduced.

Andre Ayew (Swansea)

Touch fortunate with his goal but produced a beautiful pass for Swansea’s winner.

Dusan Tadic (Southampton)

A quickfire brace killed off the Canaries and gave Southampton a first win.

Scott Sinclair (Aston Villa)

An orthodox choice to fill Villa’s center-forward void, but produced a fine performance against Sunderland.