Terrace Talk: Man United - Van Gaal in danger of overseeing a circus act
“The first match that I played was against Swansea, we lost [1-2], and now I have to play the 50th match. I hope we can show our fans that we have improved, because that’s the main thing.”
Having then watched United lose 2-1 to the same opponents again, despite all that interim spending, one may feel entitled to wonder whether LVG’s circus vocation lies more in the clown direction, especially given our defence’s impressive essaying of that old big-top classic, The Exploding Car.
He didn’t help matters afterwards either, causing many a Red jaw to drop with this: “We could have scored much more goals; that is not the problem. You need a little bit of luck.”
It’s all down to ‘luck’? Really?! Nothing, then, to do with having a comedy ’keeper who’s missing only the bright red nose? Or a hilariously oafish chump upfront who set new standards for cackfootedness yesterday? And is it ‘unlucky’ that we are still so slow, tedious, and easily beaten back by any English team we face these days? As for the hatful of goals that LVG thinks we could have scored, one can only surmise that the manager must have been the only person inside that dressing room who can still claim to have a lively imagination.
There was certainly little sign of that essential quality on the pitch.
By the end of the match, we were having to resort to pumping up desperate long balls to Fellaini, always the surest sign over the past two years that the game’s truly up in every respect. Thus was extinguished that briefest period of optimism post-Bruge — and even then, it had been a feeling that most of us knew, even after several litres of Belgium’s finest, was resting on slim foundations.
Yet here we go again: No sooner was the lesson painfully learned than we’re already getting our hopes up once more. Because, yes, it’s that wonderful 24-hour period when you can put the previous few weeks down as a glorified pre-season and dream of thrilling acquisitions from far-flung places. (Note to Ed W: some trundler from Stoke will not cut it.) The right alchemical injection and all your team’s problems are over. Or so every football fan will be dreaming today, anyway.
As I write on a Sunday evening, the rumours are pinging into the inbox. For example, I am hearing whispers of besuited United personnel being seen in Monaco for the PSG game, and excited mutterings about a possible new Number 9, although no name has been attached to them.
Ever since Pedro went pear, Woodward-watchers have been convinced that he will be doing his damnedest to pull off a September Surprise, and I am thus one of those who’s not going to put the boot in until after Tuesday, just in case. After all, to be fair to him, the early part of the summer’s dealings still looks like a decent job of work, and most of the disposals have been those that the fans would have chosen too.
Even if Ed doesn’t sign a star striker today or tomorrow, he has some political cover — with the media at least. Remember: LVG refused to contradict the club’s line that Pedro was the manager’s decision, rather than the vice-president’s failure, and there is even some evidence that this may be partly true.
But that won’t assuage the fans, of course, who almost to a man seem to be agreed that upfront is where the most urgent attention is pantingly required. So if you thought the weeping and wailing from Reds was loud enough last night, wait until you hear the howls on Tuesday, should they be warranted.
A season of relying on Rooney would then loom, and no number of hat-tricks against substandard continental tiddlers would suffice to make that attractive to any of us at the moment...
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