‘I’m good, I promise’: Conor Niland's deep dive on the loneliness of the low-ranking tennis player

'I was once Ireland’s No 1 player, and tried for years to climb the global ranks. But life at the bottom of the top can be brutal

Conor Niland of Ireland

was 10 when I first told my folks that I wanted to give up playing tennis. They didn’t yield then, and they never did. Tennis was our family business. I first picked up a racket at the age of three, and spent 15 years of my life travelling the world in pursuit of entry into major tournaments.

I spent all of September 2005 – including my 24th birthday – alone in Switzerland, playing four week-long tournaments back to back. After 20 matches and with two trophies under my belt, I was ready for a rest. But I had already entered a tournament in Edinburgh – not knowing Switzerland would be quite so intense – for my ninth tournament in 10 weeks.