Enda McEvoy's TV View: Kerry odyssey survives game of inches

The RTÉ and BBC panels examined the controversial incidents exhaustively.

Seán O'Brien of Kerry celebrates after scoring his side's second goal during the GAA Football All-Ireland Senior Championship semi-final match between Dublin and Kerry at Croke Park in Dublin. Photo by Stephen McCarthy/Sportsfile

Neat item of drollery in the Guardian over the weekend at the top of an article about the forthcoming film version of The Odyssey. “Warning: contains 2,600-year-old spoilers.” 

The piece you’re about to read contains a spoiler and we’ll get it out of the way now. Kerry’s scoring efficiency rate, as brought to us at the final whistle by the stats goblins from BBC Northern Ireland, was 71 per cent compared to Dublin’s 49 per cent.

Anyone unaware of the final score will immediately draw a number of inferences. That Kerry won. That they won by five or six points, in line with Tomás Ó Sé’s forecast on RTÉ shortly before throw-in, if not indeed by eight or nine. That they possessed the more accurate forwards and that that ultimately made the difference, as it almost invariably does.

And all of that would be true – granted, four points was the winning margin rather than five or six – but it doesn’t tell the full story of a Homeric struggle, the latest instalment of a pairing that grows old but never stale.

Notwithstanding the spells woven by the Cliffords, to a large extent Dublin left this one behind them and to a lesser extent they had no luck at all. And that last part mattered because no underdogs can win without two requirements: everything going right for them and the rub of the green.

Early goal for Kerry after David Clifford tucks away the rebound from his own penalty. “Only the 28th championship goal for him now,” Conor McManus deadpans in the BBC commentary position.” But should it have been a penalty? Did Peadar Ó Cofaigh Byrne foul Joe O’Connor or simply stand his ground? Might O’Connor have been charging?

At half-time the panellists on both channels deem the award “soft” with one of the Croke Park heroes of the previous day, honorary Wickla man Oisín McConville, going so far as to suggest it should have been a free out. “It’s more charging than otherwise.” First break of serve against Dublin.

Kerry snaffle another goal seven minutes into the second half after Dublin have restarted brilliantly and could well be leading by six points instead of three. Dylan Geaney’s attempt falls short and Sean O’Brien gets a touch to divert it over the line. Square ball?

After the final whistle the two panels examine the episode exhaustively, replay upon replay. There’s no room for argument. Square ball, even if there wasn’t much in it. Philly McMahon is livid. “It’s a hard call but that’s why you have umpires.” Second break of serve against the boys in blue.

The third service break arrives 12 minutes from the end, with Kerry five up, when the mother of all scrimmages occurs at the Railway End. Near misses, heroic blocks, goalline clearances, rebounds off the woodwork, the lot. It ends with a free out and the winners' lead intact. But was – shades of Geoff Hurst 60 years ago this month – the ball over the line?

RTÉ summon up more angles than the footage of JFK’s assassination – and yes, it does look like it was. “Flip it, lads, it’s so hard to see that in real time,” Tomás complains.

Paul Flynn isn’t having it and echoes Philly before proceeding to channel his inner Al Pacino. “I think you’re very kind on umpires. They have one job. It’s to tell us when the ball goes over the line. This game is a game of inches. All the inches today were taken by Kerry by some of the officiating.” 

Getting home from Troy after he’d helped trash the joint ought to have been a doddle for Odysseus. Instead it took the poor fecker ten years, buffeted at every turn by malicious deities and unfavourable winds and ghastly monsters and evil sorceresses. Dublin, the poor feckers, will know how he felt. Maybe they should give a trip to the pictures a skip for the foreseeable.

Jack O’Connor materialises and surprisingly enough doesn’t proffer a “yerra” when asked about Mayo’s performance. “Kobe McDonald looks a serious player,” he declares. Time for Kobe to start worrying. Kerry have spent more than a century making serious players looks rather less than serious when it comes to the big day.

The Kingdom’s latest odyssey continues. Next instalment coming to a TV screen near you on Sunday week.

To conclude on a fashion note. Sarah Mulkerrins, the BBC’s anchor, was sporting green nail varnish. Fair enough. Nothing there to frighten anyone’s horses. Word of advice though, Saz. Don’t try this again next Sunday.