The mystery of Shergar may never be solved, but at least we know what happened to his teeth
Now, how often does that happen? But the English press, having already measured up Liverpool’s wedge-battered body for a pine box, was never going to let us savour the moment.
They weren’t about to marvel at Riise’s remarkable powers of recuperation. So remarkable that he can now score stunning goals with a foot he could barely stand on before. Maybe he should take a fabricated whipping every week? No, we were not only subjected to the same excruciating “jokes” in every single report, we even had to read steaming great piles of moralistic piffle about Bellamy’s hilarious “F**k you” celebrations.
Sorry we pooped your party. Think of it as a mere delay in the festivities. You may even be able to celebrate next week. There are too many conversations about our quarter-final opponents for my liking. Was this epochal result achieved with a performance to match? Hardly, although in terms of spirit and resolve it measured up to the great nights of 2005.
Rafa had a lot riding on this. He had a great record in this stadium during his Valencia days, so he clearly wanted to maintain it.
There was also the matter of correcting a fatal flaw from last season, namely the cowardly game plan at Benfica. Having treated the FA Cup shabbily in his first season, he won it in his second. This tendency to learn from his mistakes is something to cling to whenever you start thinking he might not make the grade.
Even before Deco made the away goal a necessity rather than a luxury, Liverpool had shown attacking intent. Faith in Bellamy was repaid, and Kuyt should have put us ahead before Riise actually did so. It was hardly “backs to the wall” stuff.
Barca unravelled long before the winner. If anyone knows how you win a Nobel Prize I’d happily nominate the inventor of the away goals rule.
Before Bellamy put his vast neck strength to good use the Catalan giants played with freedom and skill. Afterwards, their internal contemplation over how many goals were now needed to take into the second leg played on their minds to a destructive degree.
If they should open the scoring in six days’ time it will then be Liverpool’s turn to deal with the pressure of mathematical uncertainty. One can only pray we show more fortitude than our opponents did.
It could all change with a single flash of Ronaldinho’s talent and those startlingly large gnashers. The mystery of Shergar may never be solved, but at least we know what happened his teeth.
If we are eventually beaten, at least I’ll have the minuscule compensation of never having to listen to that dreadful “Athens” song again. How the hell are we supposed to win the cup in “Ancient Greece”? Unless someone has a time machine that seats 50,000.
I still think Eto’o will play a part, which is columnist-speak for “boy did I screw that one up last week”. Anyone wants me to select lottery numbers, please form an orderly queue.
To confirm my status as a latter-day Nostradamus, the Mascherano deal went through at the same time. He couldn’t have had an easier ride for his eventual debut if he’d lain on a bed of rose leaves in the centre circle.
Neil Warnock frothed at the mouth during his weekly referee rant, having been denied his Underdog Rights.
Is anyone even listening nowadays? Like the people living next to Niagara Falls, the poor folk of Sheffield would go crazy if they couldn’t hear that pitiful whining in the background.
How stupid do you have to be to keep fouling Gerrard at the Kop end with the referee standing two yards away? And he’s got the nerve to accuse Bennett of “not knowing the game”? Lecture your player, not the media or the officials. But as everyone knows, the most dangerous place to stand in England is between Warnock and a microphone.
Gerrard still seems to coast through most matches yet he won two penalties and scored the goal of the game. There’s an art to making it look so effortless I suppose.
Saving himself for Saturday? Here’s hoping.
CONNECT WITH US TODAY
Be the first to know the latest news and updates
