Man United have become a stinking mess

It must be halfway through Full Metal Jacket when Lt Lockhart, editor of the US military’s Stars and Stripes newspaper, briefs his men in the wake of the surprise attack by the North Vietnamese Army and the Viet Cong that would go down in history as the Tet Offensive.

Every major military target in the country has been attacked, he explains. The US Embassy in Saigon has been overrun by suicide squads. The vital military outpost of Khe Sanh is standing by to be overrun. Maybe worst of all is the fact the legendary and agenda-defining broadcaster Walter Cronkite is about to declare the war as unwinnable.