Thank you, Mr Henry

WITH just six days to go to Johannesburg and almost eight months since Paris, it is time to look on the bright side, time to move beyond the recognised five stages of grief – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and that “low-down, no-good, cheating b*****d Henry” – time to acknowledge that defeat in the play-off was the best thing that could have happened to us, that nothing good could have come of our boys going big game hunting in South Africa and that, all things considered, the nation has been spared a World Cup of pain.

Here then, are 10 reasons to be grateful that we were touched by the hand of Henry.

If you’re not in, you can’t lose. This is the fundamental reason why your canny correspondent has never bought a Lotto ticket although, interestingly, failure to buy one, as far as I can see, seems to have given me as much a chance of winning as the vast majority who do splash out on their foolish dream. Similarly, Ireland’s failure to qualify means we can enjoy about as much success in the finals as if we were actually taking part, bearing in mind that winning is rarely part of our strategy at big tournaments anyway. But the real beauty of all this is that we will be mercifully spared the indescribable pain of defeat or the frustration of failing to perform. Remember Ireland versus Egypt?