Phoney War or Cold War? A bit of both, really.

A long day’s journey into night on Saturday, with Cork and Tipperary serving up an entertaining tussle that felt for a while as though it might never end.

The groans can still be heard, from coast to coast, in hamlet and city alike, the plain people of Ireland asking for it to stop.

There was no handshake between the managers when this ended.

Mike Quirke’s Laois footballers recorded their first win of the campaign when they emerged with six-points to spare over Armagh at MW Hire O’Moore Park, Portlaoise, on Saturday evening.

Scotland threw everything at the hosts in the closing stages but some heroic defence saw Ireland hold on.

GIVEN that the issue is largely to do with the men in the middle and how they apply — or not — the rules of the game, let’s start with a former All-Ireland referee.

Taking his lead from Jurgen Klopp and club captain Jordan Henderson, Van Dijk refuses to countenance the question of ‘when?’ preferring to preface such talk with ‘if’ about the title lift

Now that’s what you call a 10 out of 10 performance. Ten years since United last did the double over City; 10 games unbeaten now since our midwinter nadir.

Every sportswriter is a trader in nostalgia. It comes with the territory: Instant memories. Even if you file a match report on the whistle it’s already fading into the past — “matches previously played” was Christopher Hitchens’ phrase.

The Division 2B final will also be an all-Ulster affair.

Hegarty finished Saturday night’s NHL game against Waterford with 1-5 to his name.

A goal and a point in the closing moments of the first half and four points without reply in the dying minutes of the contest left the Castlebar boys dancing in the rain at the final whistle.

Matt Every shot an opening-day 65 to claim the overnight lead in the Arnold Palmer Invitational at Bay Hill in Orlando.

Hull 1 Stoke 2

Rangers 1 Celtic 0

Jacob Zuma was sworn in as South Africa’s new president today, and vowed to work to fulfil the dreams of all his people amid a global economic meltdown after he overcame corruption and sex scandals to reach the nation’s highest office.

Jacob Zuma officially became South Africa’s new president today.

Connacht 12 Ulster 14

FIFA president Sepp Blatter believes referees in charge of major matches should come from fully professional leagues in the wake of Chelsea’s controversial UEFA Champions League defeat against Barcelona on Wednesday evening.